Threads Morphing into Bullying

[kiss*my*pixel]

Okay - some of you may know me, others won’t. I don’t post as often these days as I would like.

Here is one of the reasons. Bullying, pure and simple.

I have popped in during the last few days, and yet again I can see certain posters ganging up and attempting to bully others into submission.

As I see it, this is a public forum. It is here for all to post a point of view. If anyone cares to disagree, then why can it not be done calmly, respectfully and with thought to a person’s feelings? A bit like real life. I have friends of long standing, whose views I don’t always agree with (and vice versa). We are still able to exchange views without things getting personal, aggressive and downright rude.

A few threads I have read over the last few days appear (in my small, limited mind) to have morphed into bullying, and quite frankly, it is not very comfortable to read.

If you don’t agree with another poster’s view, then why is it not possible to just say so nicely - rather than resort to ridicule and name-calling. None of us ever always agrees with another's point of view. That's life!

This behaviour is not pleasant, and is putting me off from posting (can’t speak for others, of course, this is just my feeling). 😐

[*.*..lola..*.*]

I wasn't trying to single out anyone in particular

LOL

[kiss*my*pixel]

😮

Lola - really 🙂

[blackburn_stevie]

The thing about forum bullying is that it is different from the ordinary, schoolyard variety. As an example, if somebody is so tied up in their viewpoint, is it bullying if that person steamrolls over everyone, not because they are acting like a bully but simply because they can't see any viewpoint other than their own. A typical example of this sort of thing would be those folk who think that politicians, from either one side or the other, never do any wrong.

[kiss*my*pixel]

I would think, Stevie, that it is all in the delivery.

Politicians are one thing, but people having a chat on a board or in the pub is something else entirely. If someone holds an opinion, then that is their opinion. Opinions can possibly be changed, and people can possibly be swayed by another's point of view. It has to be done respectfully, though. It's no good bulldozing your way through someones opinions or beliefs, or being rude to them. That could be classed as bullying. IMO! If someone thinks a politician is right and another thinks he/she is wrong, then both those people should be able to put forward their points of view without fear of ridicule. This is why (thankfully) we are a democratic country.

I've been guilty of it in the past myself (not intentionally, I hasten to add and I'm sure I'm not alone). However, once I realise (or it's been pointed out to me) I will apologise.

Perhaps this is another angle to it all - sometimes people bully without realising. In forums and other social networking sites, it is possible to maybe misread someone's comments, type something out, post it and then afterwards think to yourself "Oh, that seems a bit harsh".

There is some bullying going on though (on here), that seems consistent, persistent, personal and sometimes aggressive. It just seems so to me. Whilst I know all posters on here are adults and are more than capable of defending their own corner, it does make for uncomfortable reading, sometimes. Just my own opinion, and the reason for the thread.

[barbara.1482]

Some people that complain about being bullied are often bullies themselves!!

I would like to know if standing up to a bully is classed as being a bully as well?:-)

[upthecreekyetagain]

I'm not convinced that hostile comments on a board such as the RT can be classified as bullying.

I've certainly never felt bullied on here,

I've felt annoyed at times by some posts and I admit to making posts with the deliberate intention of annoying those who have annoyed me - if that puts me in a "bad light" with some then so be it. 🙂

If we all agreed with each other and didn't have strong enough feelings about certain subjects to fight our corner then it would be a very dull board indeed.

Some posters may use tactics, including personal insults, which should really please their opponents in any debate because it just demonstrates they have won the argument.

[shaun6660_7]

Could I ask - are you the Shaun who was looking for a missing friend in the Cornwall(?) area about a year or so ago? If so, I often wondered how you got on (I've never been a very regular poster). Did you find him? 

Hi Pixel - yes that was me 🙂

My friend david eventually turned up at home - bedraggled and bewildered - he didnt know how he had got home and had lost all his belongings - he has since been admitted to hospital having had a stroke and has been in for 9 months. sadly it looks as though that may become permanent 😞 a waste of a good man whose adventures would make a very interesting book which unfortunately will never get written.

I do still wander around the RT but rarely post - the fun seems to have been driven out of the forum. but never say never (oh dear I said it twice does that count?) 😮

[5129frederick]

I must admit I haven't really noticed it to any great extent, but that's because I find public bickering somewhat boring, so when I do come across it, I just skim past it, but, if someone is really getting up your nose, tell him very publicly, on board for all others to read and laught aqbout at  his expense, that you find him such a bore, you have no intention of corresponding with him in any shape or form, and that to make sure he will not be pestering you in the future, you have had him blocked as a bidder - PERMANETLY!  Now that really will put his nose out of joint!!  :^O:^O  Don't worry about losing one potential customer - there are about twenty million others out there.  I've done it myself, as a seller.  Nothing get's up a person's nose more than being told officially that his custom is no longer wanted.  The abuse I got from one person I was forced to give a refund to when I told him what I'd done, was classic!  😄  As the saying goes - there's more than one way to skin a cat.  😉

[bankhaunter]

Nothing get's up a person's nose more than being told officially that his custom is no longer wanted

I don't know about that, there have been one or two posters that have been asked by others to be put on their BBL. 🙂

[merehazle]

#7  lola

'A lot of threads seem to go these days'

Yes, mine did two days ago for no apparent reason. No e-mail, no slap, no advice why? What nonsense, and how unfair is that?

Anyway back to this thread:

Read it carefully and much of the story is here. #1 is a good start - then right on through... the answers are there ;-).

See you :-D.

[shaun6660_7]

well I took my time replying to this 😄 my mate was found in Cornwall - unfortunately he has since had a stroke and has no idea who i am - I greatly miss his company and the nights of chat and banter that we had.

only just had notification of a comment on here so was surprised to be able to find it again - is the RT still going ?

[fallen-archie]

Hello Shaun,
Yes still going but on life suppprt, I remember this thread and am sorry to learn of your friends demise, non of us are any younger and quite a few have sadly passed away. Always good to see an old face 😃

[shaun6660_7]

cheers - may well venture back - I miss the friendly abuse and banter 😄