Bill & Charlie's Bar

[bill-xxx]

Hello to all our old friends and newcomers alike. Welcome to Bill & Charlie's Bar - the place to meet other posters and to sit and chat while you sample your favourite tipple. Plenty to drink, lots of joking but alas no smoking.

We are open all hours (hic) and run a respectable Bar. (Although I argued with Charlie until I was blue in the face over that one!) No swearing, spitting or drun..drunk...drunken beeeehaviour (hic). We have a couple of bouncers to hand ~ she comes in on Friday nights.

Teetotallers are welcome and will be treated as normal. I jest ~ soft drinks are available at the bar along with light snacks. And finally, please use the emergency exit when Bill rambles on about the good ol' days and put plugs in your ears when Charlie 'sings'.

Come on in...:-D

[suzieseaside]

Thank you bill :-x  - they look very tasty.  I'll save myself for a joint next Sunday.

Now correct me if I am being daft (:^O 😛 ) but it seems to me that in this virtual bar and eatery you could serve anything if you have the pics for it, so please could we have rostbif next weekend? I'll slave away in the kitchen while you and charlie charm the customers - just get the mustard in - English please :^O

[bill-xxx]

Had some riff-raff in here last night! :_|

When I said to Harry 'Would you like a shot' she was delighted!

....and shot the @@@@@@ CCTV to smithereens! :_|

Thank gawd for Slick Jack's Insurance plc :O:^O

[bill-xxx]

Thank you bill :-x  - they look very tasty.  I'll save myself for a joint next Sunday.

Now correct me if I am being daft (:^O 😛 ) but it seems to me that in this virtual bar and eatery you could serve anything if you have the pics for it, so please could we have rostbif next weekend? I'll slave away in the kitchen while you and charlie charm the customers - just get the mustard in - English please :^O

Hi Suzie :-x

If you check the Intro you will note that light snacks are available on request. However, since you have put it so nicely, I will arrange a Board Meeting with Charlie and discuss your proposal.

Can't be fairer than that, can I? 😄

Take a seat or have a walk in the garden. Enjoy the new bar...:-x

[bill-xxx]

Very reasonable.

Sorry I'm late, I mislaid my invitation to the opening night.:-D

Hello Margaret :-x

Glad you like it. Sorry we missed you earlier. Hope to see you back again soon 🙂

[Anonymous]

That is no steak you put on there.....looks Korean to me..............

Is it so difficult to get a normal steak in this place....and some normal salad.....?

[bill-xxx]

[bill-xxx]

Steak, French (Pfft) Fries, & Salad for Harry...:-x

Fresh this morning, Harry. Best steak in the house. 😄

Nice guns you have there. 😄

[**caution**opinion_ahead]

One fish 'n' chips in a basket for caution...:-x

All caught locally I might add ~ orf the coast of St.Albans...:-D

Very tasty. 😄  I must visit Port St Albans some time. :^O

Now, for dessert.  I think sticky toffee pud would go down nicely.  Failing that, some of the early strawberries they were boasting about on the news the other night.  Just make sure they are not those tasteless Elsanta ones. 😐

[bill-xxx]

Fresh from the Garden Of England this morning, Caution 😄

Has been a very good year for strawberries down here.

:^O

I must visit Port St Albans some time.

Charlie often paddles there ~ bless! :^O

[jake*the*plumber]

Morning Grubby, you're up early for a Sunday B-)

[bill-xxx]

Afternoon Jake. Can I get you a drink...?

[jake*the*plumber]

That's very decent of you old boy, a glass of claret would go down very well with my lunch 😄

[bill-xxx]

My pleasure...:-)

Enjoy your visit...:-)

[jake*the*plumber]

To your very good health...........glug glug hic!

[bill-xxx]

A Scouser tells the barman that he's looking for a job and asks if he has heard of anything going. The barman tells him that he is in luck.

A local millionaire has just been in looking for a chauffeur. The job pays £60K p.a. for a 30 hour working week with duties comprised mostly of ferrying the millionaire's nymphomaniac supermodel around between shoots and seeing that her every need is catered for.

"You're taking the @@@@!" exclaims the Scouser.

"Well, you started it!" replied the barman. :^O

[jake*the*plumber]

*wonders if there's a quiet corner somewhere I can get a doobie together* B-)

[bill-xxx]

Nip out the back behind the skip...:O 😄

[bill-xxx]

A bloke goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Jeez, why are you drinking so fast?"

The bloke says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had."

The bartender says, "What do you have?"

The bloke says, "50 pence."

😮

:^O

[jake*the*plumber]

:^O a cracker

[suzieseaside]

:^O and a snipe?