EBay - Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?

[suelel1968]

Back in the day Shakespeare would have said this about EBay... What would the Baird compare it to now?

... an inflatable dart board...

[carrotdrusus2]

And my final one,

'Beware the ideas of March'

think about that one its very good.

[carrotdrusus2]

Sorry I had to do another one

'Cry havoc and let slip the parcels of Evri'

[suelel1968]

Hi Moon @moonlight-rhapsody I had to look that up: Noisome - something offensive or disgusting—typically relating to smell. Think of a reeking garbage heap on a hot day, or the stench of rotting food. It's not just a little unpleasant; it’s aggressively awful.

That's fair!

[moonlight-rhapsody]

Eye of newt, and toe of frog

On ebay, can we these things flog?

Alas, I fear it's too much slog

So 'till it changes, out I'll log.

[suelel1968]

Hi Carrot @carrotdrusus2 

That poignant line—“For Heavens sake, let us sit upon the ground, and tell sad stories of the death of eBay”—is a dramatic reimagining drawn from Shakespeare’s Richard II, where King Richard mourns fallen kings.

This line reflects a shared sentiment: that eBay, once a glorious marketplace full of promise, now feels disillusioning, mired in “comedy of errors,” flawed AI listings, and policy woes.

Shakespeare's grandiose and melancholic tone elevates the grumbling into performance art. It underscores that for long-time sellers, eBay’s changes aren’t just inconvenient—they’re a kind of betrayal of the platform’s former glory.

 It's not just venting—it’s eBay's decline told through prose befitting a lost kingdom. And what better stage than a forum of witty curators and drama-savvy sellers?

I am definitely not one of the "drama savvy sellers". I'm off to finish reading my James Patterson now. But I just had to find out what James would think of Ebay.

“The seller thought they were winning. The buyer filed a return. Everyone lost.” If he wrote a novel about eBay’s current state, it might be part thriller, part farce—perhaps The Postage Protocol Conspiracy. One high-value item, one missing tracking number, and twenty pages of suspense.

[moonlight-rhapsody]

I'm loving Copilot - I wish he was my friend!

[carrotdrusus2]

And another 'There is a world elsewhere'

[moonlight-rhapsody]

...and yet...

Beyond this place, there be dragons

...however...

Here be dragons to be slain, here be rich rewards to gain

[suelel1968]

There is a world elsewhere” from Coriolanus isn’t just a dismissal of one city’s politics—it’s a defiant declaration of freedom, of seeking new paths when the current one becomes unbearable.

Who knew Shakes would still be so relevant today?

My “friend" also came up with "shall i compare thee to an old masterpiece being restored by 3 year olds with crayons". 

[muckyboy1978]

More like an infartable flate board. Not just useless but literally without purpose. I have removed all listings. Time to focus elsewhere. 

[carrotdrusus2]

Try,

'There is something rotten in the state of Ebay'

[moonlight-rhapsody]

There are more things in the South American rainforest, Horatio, than are dreamt of in ebay

[carrotdrusus2]

Neither a seller nor a buyer be

[moonlight-rhapsody]

this be madness, and there be no method in't

[suelel1968]

"chaos without coherence, lamenting a system perceived as senseless

This ongoing thread where sellers reframe their frustrations with eBay policies and practices through Shakespearean parody allows sellers critique the platform’s convoluted rules, algorithm quirks, and perceived loss of integrity—often with humor and literary flair. So this line becomes a dramatic crescendo: a punchline that declares not just disorder, but complete absence of rationale or oversight in the way eBay currently operates."

He's beginning to sound like Churchill!

[moonlight-rhapsody]

"He's beginning to sound like Churchill!"

This is the lesson: never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never—in nothing, great or small, large or petty—never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of ebay.

[dancewithadingo]

Here is another one for you, from that well known tragedy:

The Merchant of eBay

[dancewithadingo]

Here is a final one dedicated to the buyer who doesn't tell the truth in order to get a refund:

King Liar

[suelel1968]

@dancewithadingo @Act I: The Parcel of Peril A modest package leaves the seller’s keep, With bubble wrap and hopes packed deep. But lo! The buyer cries: “I received but air!