Ok, thank you, some background info would help I guess.
5 years ago, I started doing WWAH (weightwatchers at home) which I bought on a disc at a carboot sale. My first marriage had just broken up, my father had died a few months previously, I was 33 and a half stone and a heavy smoker, no husband, 3 kids one with special needs and a terminally ill mother. Life looked cr@p!
I lost 11 stone in about 12 months and then the diet stopped working! Dont ask me why, I didnt change the formula, the formula changed on me. I tried every diet going but I didnt lose an ounce for 3 years. I didnt gain an ounce either though, so I carried on happily with my life.
I remarried, and after going through my own personal hell with my mum I finally moved her into a retirement home so she could get the care she really needed and I could get a break, and the weight started to pile on. After weighing 22 stone for 3 years, I got on the scales to find I was weighing in at 25 and a half stone (this was last week) I went back on slimming world and lost 9 lbs, but the second week, despite sticking t it just as I had the week before I gained it all back. I dont understand the logic of it all, and I hate the restrictions the slimming world diet imposes on me. I was actually crying because I didnt have enough choices left for a slice of toast. And I'm sorry, 25 stone or not, no one should have to cry for a slice of toast! Anyway, I am at stalemate. The WW diet doesnt want to work for me, the slimming world one makes me ill, I have stomach ulcers and the high protien days kill me, I also have IBS so the green days mean I spend them sat alone farting out vile aromas!
A year ago I opened an MSN group in the hope it would spur me on to lose some weight, we are number 1 in our field, but it hasnt helped at all! I am helping all these women get to goal (and yes they are following WW) and I cant lost a bloody pound! Its all very frustrating. I wont go to a WW class cos my leader is sick of seeing me and watching me fail, so I feel like a failure before I even begin and I was hoping Lindi would be able to advise me week by week and maybe spot something in my diet that I am missing, that is of course with everyone elses support too.
I just dont want to be the fattest person in a room anymore. I have given up smoking, today makes it 3 weeks without a cigarette, and i am totally over it, but this weight is killing me. My hips are so bad carrying the excess I can barely walk, I take painkillers every day, though only a maximum of 4 to get me through and my back is bad too. I am an insomniac, sleeping 3 hours a night on average and would love to be able to sleep 8 hours like other people, would help the pints balance out a little better too. I cant do much exercise due to the pain I am in, but I have got to do something! Oh, I am 5 foot 9 and a size 32.
I am so sorry for rambling on and on but it helps to have the full picture I guess. Underneath this humungous exterior is someone very frightened of a heart attack.
Thank you for reading.