70soghuBMoj(ld!L!~~_7.JPG "merehazle"){kind=avatar}
A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "sorry, we don't serve food".
What's the difference between a woman & a goat?
Quite a lot, according to the law...
He was in ecstasy, a huge smile on his face, as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again....back and forth ...back and forth ...in and out ...in and out. She could feel the sweat on her forehead and between her breasts and trickling down the small of her back, she was getting near to the end. Her heart was pounding, her face was flushed, then she moaned, softly at first, then louder. Finally, totally exhausted, she let out an almighty scream and shouted:
"OK, OK! I CAN'T park the damned car! You do it .....YOU SMUG PIG!"
(Certain words have been altered from the original but I guess you knew that, lol)
Husband and wife having dinner and she says .....
"Have you ever seen a twenty pound note all crumpled up?"
"No," replied her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, slowly reached into her cleavage and pulled out a crumpled twenty pound note and gave it to him..
"Have you ever seen a fifty all crumpled up?" she asked.
"Uh, no," he said.
She gave him another sexy little smile, seductively reached into her panties and pulled out a crumpled fifty pound note.
"Now," she said, "Have you ever seen £30,000 all crumpled up?"
"No," he said, now really intrigued.
"Well, go look in the garage..."
I had some bad news yesterday. My old friend Gavin died. Choked to death on a indigestion tablet.
It's hard to believe that Gav' is gone.
I think you might have to be old like me to get this one:
I'm planning on opening a restaurant specialising in healthy folded pizzas, that will be run by members of a small lower california community.
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