World's most dangerous joke?

[5129frederick]

I was with a group of mates in  a pub and we all started telling jokes.  All went well until I came out with: "Tyneside has a new National Anthem."

"Oh, what's that?" Somebody asked. with a smile because he'd heard it before, to which I immediately rang out:

"I'm busy doing nothing, nothing the whole day through, trying to find lots of things not to do .."

Everybody laughed except one bloke in particular.

"It's no joke, boh!  We Jordies work a damn site harder that you Southerners.  There's nothing funny aboot being oota work."  He then called me Sass.

"Alright, don't take it personally."  I said with a shrug.  The trouble was, he did.  The fool took it as a personal pop and raved about the situation up North.  I was lucky to get out of that one alive!

[ginap.123]

Do you get on with anyone?

[5129frederick]

Yes - myself.  I used to be conceited, but not anymore.  Now I'm perfect.

Does that answer your question?

[margaret*e]

What does sass mean?.

[5129frederick]

Sassenach - it's a derogitory term used by those well north of the border - Edinburgh, Aberdeen, places like that, to describe an Englishman.  It comes from the Latin word Saxone, meaning Saxon.  (Anglo Saxon).  I'd never heard of the phrase until I went up to Scotland to meet a penfriend.

[margaret*e]

Right, I know the  word sassenach, a scottish word, so why would a Geordie call you that.

I've never heard it used in that context.

[5129frederick]

Search me.  As I said, I'd never even heard of the word until I went up to Scotland for a week and then I was told what it meant by a bus conductor who'd joked: "Oh no.  We've got another Sassenach with us!"  I laughed too when she told me, taking it in the light in which it was given.  I then asked her why a fifty pence piece was shaped the way it was.  She didn't know.

"So you can get it out of a Scotsman's pocket with a spanner!"  I replied.  She loved it.  This was years ago when North Sea oil came ashore with heated discussions whether it belonged to Scotland or England.

One of the few people who insisted on being referred to as a Scot was Duncan Goodhew.  He was very pro but had a very unsporting streak in him.  He was asked to compete against a fifteen year schoolgirl at breaststroke over a distance of three lengths at Crystal Palace with her having a one-length start on Jim'll Fix It.  No medals or money were involved, but he made damn certain he beat her by a short head at the finishing line with not even a hint of a smile as he hung the "Jim Fixed It For Me!" medal round her neck on television.  It really would have meant so much to her, but no way whoud he let it be.  There was no prize money, but had he had the grace to let her win, it would have meant everything to her and more.  After that he came well down in my estimation as a sportsman.

[5129frederick]

Massive faux pas on my part - 

Duncan Goodhew is an ENGLISHMAN!  

Sorry Duncan, if you're reading this - no offense meant!

[bitsnknots]

Methinks that this is a case of foot in mouth syndrome.

[5129frederick]

Absolutely   First to admit it.  A real classic on my part although it doesn't alter my opinion of the man.

[plpmr]

Foot and mouth!!!

Let me have the address so I can send around the vet.

[bitsnknots]

Frederick, England does extend a fair bit passed Watford Gap.

[5129frederick]