love from dairy and DD.....xx
Hello my lovely. Great to 'hear your voice'. Hope you enjoyed your day...even with the footy! lol 
Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ................................sorry rainy not looking good is it
First of all, the foootball. I have had to come away as we scored, and then 2 mins later, so did they. Aaaaargh!!!! And then again about 2 mins ago. Too tense for me. I watch the cricket too Chris, my son plays, I even know the rules
To those newbies wondering who in the heck is she (me) - I used to be about, and enjoyed joining in with everything, including MDCC. Then I was diagnosed with cancer in Sept 2012 and did post about it, when I now know I should not have, too emotive a subject, but my head wasn't right. I was too emotional so stopped posting. I have a rare form of blood cancer, Myeloma, (naturally, as my doc said 'trust you to get something exotic'). Now it is incurable and predicted lifespan is difficult, but we're talking kinda 5/10 years at the absolute max. BUT please no-one jump in with commiserations because I am fine. I had a stem cell transplant in October 2013 and my cancer cell count now is negligible, but the cells never go, they are controlled but can return at any time. I will say this. If there is something you REALLY want to do and you sit on the sofa of a night and think, watching the telly, 'I'd love to do that' - whether it's swimming with dolphins or seeing giraffes in their natural habitat or even just (me) going to Old Trafford to see Cristiano Ronaldo score his last free kick for Man U, 200 yds
This is me (and no I don't look ill, that's part of the tragedy of this disease, because I've not had to endure surgery or radiation) in my Ebay special wig (£20).
Maybe now I am feeling a bit better I will post again sometime soon, but it's strange. Cancer is a lonely disease, and whilst I can write (like now) until a band plays, I am finding it hard to participate in 'real life' again, after 18 months of solitary confinement, but I am grand and think - 'me - got cancer - **** off' - and just get on with it, because, you know, it could be worse. This I know. Sending all good luck and good wishes, and may life be kind to you, Carol xx.
So sorry to be blind as a bat and have missed this yesterday. A belated 
Happy Birthday!
However I put this will come out awkwardly, because I am, and I know from what’s gone before that good intentions can be misconstrued, so I hope this comes out entirely the way it’s intended;
I managed to miss your original postings ( I miss many things these days!) but had picked up you were unwell and ‘in trouble.’
I’m really sorry to hear you’ve ‘struggled to participate in real life’ after forced solitary confinement, and that your husband isn’t champing at the bit at sleeping out in Arizona, ( I reckon some journeys are meant to be travelled free of encumbrances anyway!) but I couldn’t agree with your sentiments about seizing the day more!
I have my own ‘issue’ and can still drive but am unable realistically to now fly, and ‘the clocks a ticking.’ Life quality gets measured in what can’t be done as well as what can and we have to focus on the later. Life's quite full on here, and on a shoestring in more ways than one, but I make what spaces I can in it to share Dartmoor and parts of Wales, with their half wild horses, however briefly, sleeping out in the back of my van, grateful for less light pollution and the beauty of being able to properly see the starry sky, lulled to sleep with the occasional equine snort at an invading fox padding through.
Now I know that doesn’t quite cut it for (an elegant looking!) you and a dream of riding, and sleeping out on an Arizona ranch under the stars, but it probably comes from a similar place, so the next time I’m lying there, listening, perfectly content in my own madness looking up at a panorama of stars and marvelling at it all, I shall be wondering, and really hoping, that on the other side of the world you’ve made it out there, and are lying there watching the same stars, from a different angle, knowing there will be constellations I can’t see and you can, and hoping you’re taking a real good look!
I wish you strength, health to realise your dreams, things to not stand in your way, and the continued courage of your own convictions.
Life is what really happens while we’re making plans for it; so look it in the eye, grab it with both hands, and go for it.
''a bit teary''???......I'm sat here with snot and tears dripping off me chin.......
I hope the stars shine brightly for both of you....wherever you see them from
Glad to see you looking so well Carol. I hope you get to do all you want to do. You never know, 5 to 10 years is a long time in cancer research!! XX
