Jealousy ..

[john.b74]

Sexual Jealousy
A lot of people get jealous and possessive in relationships. They don’t like their partner talking with someone else, or hanging out with members of the opposite sex without them. Some people get even crazier. They get jealous about things that happened before they met their partner. They get jealous about things that might happen in the future. Hell, they get jealous about things that didn’t happen but could have happened.
Sexual jealousy is a waste of energy and toxic for your relationship.
It’s really simple: either you trust your partner or you don’t.
If you trust your partner, then shut your mouth. If you don’t trust your partner, do everyone a favor and dump them.
“Well, what if I trust them but they lie to me anyway?”
Then trust that one day you will find out. Dishonest people cannot hide their dishonesty forever. Eventually it will surface and be obvious. And on that day, dump them.
The worst part of sexual jealousy is that it drives your partner to commit the exact actions in which you’re trying to prevent them from doing in the first place. Imagine you’re dating somebody and this person is insanely jealous. Everything you do they accuse you of lying to them or sneaking around behind their back. Every person of the opposite sex you speak to they accuse you of flirting or freak out that you’re sleeping with 10 other people.
What’s stopping you from actually cheating then? I mean, you’re going to get yelled at whether you’re honest or not. Apparently they believe you’re a dishonest person anyway, so you may as well get the benefits from being dishonest, right? What’s stopping you from cheating? Not much.

[john.b74]

Sexual Jealousy
A lot of people get jealous and possessive in relationships. They don’t like their partner talking with someone else, or hanging out with members of the opposite sex without them. Some people get even crazier. They get jealous about things that happened before they met their partner. They get jealous about things that might happen in the future. Hell, they get jealous about things that didn’t happen but could have happened.
Sexual jealousy is a waste of energy and toxic for your relationship.
It’s really simple: either you trust your partner or you don’t.
If you trust your partner, then shut your mouth. If you don’t trust your partner, do everyone a favor and dump them.
“Well, what if I trust them but they lie to me anyway?”
Then trust that one day you will find out. Dishonest people cannot hide their dishonesty forever. Eventually it will surface and be obvious. And on that day, dump them.
The worst part of sexual jealousy is that it drives your partner to commit the exact actions in which you’re trying to prevent them from doing in the first place. Imagine you’re dating somebody and this person is insanely jealous. Everything you do they accuse you of lying to them or sneaking around behind their back. Every person of the opposite sex you speak to they accuse you of flirting or freak out that you’re sleeping with 10 other people.
What’s stopping you from actually cheating then? I mean, you’re going to get yelled at whether you’re honest or not. Apparently they believe you’re a dishonest person anyway, so you may as well get the benefits from being dishonest, right? What’s stopping you from cheating? Not much.

[1956glyn]

It is quite simple....as soon as all this insecurity starts...end the relationship as it is not meant to be. 

My husband and i have just the one rule in our relationship......One strike and you are out !   Cheat once and it is over.

[Anonymous]

Did you just got up this morning and thought....lets have a chat on the forum about jealous people or is there something specific that set you off in that direction? It seems somewhat random.

[cee-dee]

I think he was just looking round for jokes and came across that.

Mind you, for any women seeing any of that sort of behaviour I'd say RUN..... fast.

[mustard-tree]

I had a relationship like that back in the 1970s

Problem was that I worked as a crew bus driver and worked with a different conductor each week.

Every week, I was accused of having an affair with each one, even if the conductor was another woman

Unsurprisingly, that relationship didn't last long.

[Anonymous]

Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a little bit jealous though. I think it is only human to be a bit territorial when it comes to our own partners.

When it gets out of all proportion it becomes a real problem. I could hardly leave the house without getting into a fight about who I had seen, talked to, where I had been, how long I had been somewhere, with whom, etc, etc.  It didn't really matter what I answered, he didn't believe me whatever I said.  In my case the relationship went on for almost 5 years before I saw the light. I made sure that I never got involved with such a psycho again.

There is a new thing now though and that is called "micro" cheating. (Google it). That will cause a lot of problems and jealousy in relationships.

[**bustysinclaire**]

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@Anonymous wrote:

Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a little bit jealous though. I think it is only human to be a bit territorial when it comes to our own partners.

When it gets out of all proportion it becomes a real problem. I could hardly leave the house without getting into a fight about who I had seen, talked to, where I had been, how long I had been somewhere, with whom, etc, etc.  It didn't really matter what I answered, he didn't believe me whatever I said.  In my case the relationship went on for almost 5 years before I saw the light. I made sure that I never got involved with such a psycho again.

There is a new thing now though and that is called "micro" cheating. (Google it). That will cause a lot of problems and jealousy in relationships.

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I agree Harry xxx

If allowed to be Jealousy can be a very destructive emotion.   xxx

I had very much the same with my OH to begin with.  xxx We have now overcome it and have been married now for 38 years in March. 

On one occasion I had gone round to my next door neighbour for a coffee and a fag, (yes I did used to smoke before I came to my senses lol) I had got my old pinny on, rollers in my hair and slippers and no make up, because I had been a while I was accused of going off to see someone else and was quized on what I got up to. It was horrible.

I had to look into the reasons for his jealousy, It was insecurity!!  He had had 2 failed marriages before where it was the wives who treated him really badly, the 1s,t one early morning he arrived home from working nights and got into bed but there was an extra person in there with his wife  , the 2nd just upped and left him no reason given and gutted the house of every on of possesions they owned, he came home from work to an empty house

sometimes you do have to look further than just judge them to be bad and run xx

[Anonymous]

Yes it does often come from insecurity. I agree.

Sometimes they just can't be trusted themselves and therefore don't trust you either.

[john.b74]

I found it and it brought back the time the girl next door wasnt able to talk to me. He followed her when she went out , I moved to another house and lost contact with him and her.