Hands Up, Who wants a Job at eBay?!

[inajiffyuk]

Don't all rush now!

Not quite sure about the role of Scrum Master!

http://www.linkedin.com/job/c-ebay-jobs?_mSplash=1

[hicburp]

Looks like there are gearing up for the next major overhaul.

Which will most likely be when the majority of the small sellers

have been cleared out In August.

[Anonymous]

Don't you just love job titles and descriptions full of nonsense, made up words and phrases that you never encounter outside of offices?

Those job titles/descriptions - they are in English ............... aren't they?!

[**caution**opinion_ahead]

Is "programmatic" an actual word?

[Anonymous]

"Is "programmatic" an actual word?"

I just googled it !

They say it is, but when did you ever hear it outside of these ads?

One of the job descriptions wants someone "evangelistic" about Ebay/Paypal!!

I wonder if the people who write this nonsense have their sleeves rolled up and wear red braces?!

[Anonymous]

"eBay Enterprise, formerly known as GSI Commerce, is a leading provider of commerce technologies, omnichannel operations and marketing solutions. GSI Commerce has been driving and evolving the world of commerce since the early days of retailing on the web."

Actually, imo, Ebay haven't been "driving" anything, i'd say they've been desperately hanging on to the coat tails of internet selling, and only just managed to keep up!

Now they want to take credit for simply being in the right place at the right time!

[aernethril]

If you look at 'more' - What we offer? - apparently it's mostly ummmmmmmmmmm b***.

[wentvaleelect]

Only numptys need apply

[Anonymous]

Tbh, i'd say that those ads show everything that's wrong with Ebay.

There have been recent posts about how Ebay is out of touch, uncaring, no customer service to speak of - those ads show the Ebay mindset, needlessly complicated, over worded, full of meaningless jargon - quite pathetic really!

[tall.dude]

  Hands Up, Who wants a Job at eBay?!

Judging by the number of threads you post you're either after Alan's job or a job in marketing

[grandad-dave]

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@inajiffyuk wrote:
Don't all rush now!

Not quite sure about the role of Scrum Master!

http://www.linkedin.com/job/c-ebay-jobs?_mSplash=1

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Something to do with Rugby perhaps.. Maybe a bar tender dishing out pints of "scrum(py):smileyvery-happy:

[Anonymous]

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@inajiffyuk wrote:

Not quite sure about the role of Scrum Master!

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrum_(software_development)#Scrum_Master

[temperate_porcine]

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@brookheather wrote:

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@inajiffyuk wrote:

Not quite sure about the role of Scrum Master!

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrum_(software_development)#Scrum_Master

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OK, I read that article and I have absolutely no idea what a Scrum Master actually does.

It's all too complicated for me, I guess I won't be applying for a job at eBay unless they have a position for the bloke who empties the office bins.

[Anonymous]

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@temperate_porcine wrote:

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@brookheather wrote:

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@inajiffyuk wrote:

Not quite sure about the role of Scrum Master!

---

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrum_(software_development)#Scrum_Master

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OK, I read that article and I have absolutely no idea what a Scrum Master actually does.

It's all too complicated for me, I guess I won't be applying for a job at eBay unless they have a position for the bloke who empties the office bins.

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It's a bit like a team leader except their role is to resolve any issues for the team so they can be as efficient as possible so if Fred says he can't work on X because he is waiting for Joe to finish Y then the Scrum Master would try to remove the block or re-order the work so Fred can work on something else (in simple terms).

[temperate_porcine]

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@brookheather wrote:

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It's a bit like a team leader except their role is to resolve any issues for the team so they can be as efficient as possible so if Fred says he can't work on X because he is waiting for Joe to finish Y then the Scrum Master would try to remove the block or re-order the work so Fred can work on something else (in simple terms).

OK, I get that...but why couldn't Fred and Joe just work something out between them, are they thick or something?

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[52t-bird]

So its a BS name for a manager then??

[julie19090_0]

I want to be an "Information Extraction Engineer". Sounds as if my degree in torture could finally be put to good use.

[babylons*burning]

I'd fancy that one myself but I'm clearly under qualified with only a GNVQ level 2 in waterboarding.

[temperate_porcine]

Daily timeboxed Scrum meeting:

During the meeting, each team member answers three questions:

• SM: "What have you done since yesterday?"
• Fred: "I mostly played football in the car park and chatted up the receptionist because I'm waiting for Joe to finish project X
• SM: "What are you planning to do today?"
• Fred: "Probably the same, I reckon I'm in with a chance of pulling that receptionist"
• Any impediments/stumbling blocks? Any impediment/stumbling block identified in this meeting is documented by the Scrum Master and worked towards resolution outside of this meeting. No detailed discussions shall happen in this meeting.
• SM: "Fred, chatting up the receptionist is not part of your remit, pull your finger out and go empty the office bins or something"
• Fred: "I don't have the relevant training qualification for that task"
• SM: "Fred, you can spend the day on CS duty"
• Fred: "Noooooooooooooo!"

[temperate_porcine]

We could do with a 'make sure the flippin' formatting on seller cental behaves itself' strategic programmatic manager.