Wow; I just dragged and dropped those two from the deskto and it works; I guess all is not lost! 🙂
Here an oldie but goodie...
One day, leaning on the bar, Raymond says to John 'My elbow hurts like
hell. I suppose I'd better see a Doctor!'
Listen, don't waste your time down at the surgery,' John replies.
There's a new diagnostic computer down at Tesco Pharmacy.
Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's
wrong, and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs only two quid.
It's a lot quicker and better than a doctor - and you get Club card
points.'
So Raymond collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
Tesco. He deposits the two pounds in the slot and the computer
lights up and asks for the urine sample.
He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:-
You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was,
Raymond began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixes some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples
from his wife, his daughter and the cat, and masturbated into the mixture
for good measure.
Raymond hurries back to Tesco, eager to check what would happen. He
deposits his money, pours in his concoction, and awaits for the results.
The computer prints the following:-
1) Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener (aisle 7).
2) Your cat's having kittens. Get a Tesco Pet Insurance (at the Checkout).
3) Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo (aisle 3).
4) Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
5) Your wife is pregnant. It’s twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
6) And if you don't stop playing with yourself, your tennis elbow will
never get better.
Thank you for shopping at Tesco and remember…
Every Little Bit Helps…..
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