THE BAR IS OPEN

[captain_feathersword_1]

where are all the drinkers?


come on lindi put that laptop down.

jugs where are you?

My round first what ya all havin?

[hockey*mad]

thanks for the suggestion...i had considered just amputating their legs..or chaining them to beds..but its against law

i saw some of those metal griddles on the shopping channel..they blood washes off easly with disinfectant they reckon..didnt mention any other bodily fluid though??..so am not sure

those paramedics??..blimey i saw them in the local psycho unit..the one was shaking like a jelly all he could mutter was ribena and orifice,i couldnt make sense of it but you have shed a ray of light

did u manage to get any scratchings??..i did look in yellow pages for you but the listings kept sending me to club called legs11 and a doctor who asked me about crabs??..told him i didnt want any seafood just pork scratchings...

[electronic_workshop]

I know about chaining them to the beds - it'ds daft all these new laws the activists for the RSPB (Royal Society for the Protection of Beds) have got through. I blame Bill Oddie.

It's so difficult to get scratchings these days. Apparently some guy out in the Middle East miraculously cured leprosy about 2,000 years ago, and there just aren't the colonies around these days.

Then Gillette brought out those lady razors, and all the pigs are going around with shaven legs now, and using body lotions to attract the boars. Their skin is softer than that woman who uses mild green fairy liquid.

You get great crunchy meat if you dice it and roll it in seasoned cornflour then hot-wok it. The cat loves it!

[electronic_workshop]

btw, I should mention that up to now, the cat never liked the dog....

[hockey*mad]

damn him forever-i love scratchings...these middle eastern guys do not realise what carp they cause..do they know?eh=eh?.
i am all out of cornflour though...and the dog wont come near me since i read out yr post to her...so will just alter the recipe to the parrot?.after all everything tastes like chicken doesnt it?

never use gillette myself..find i get a much closer shave with a guinea pig streched out with elastic bands teeth akimbo to gnaw the hairs out,beats immac anytime u should try it..i bet its a bit of a good entertainment seeing a guy having a rodent gnawing on his chin??...u could charge..

[electronic_workshop]

I think the Norwegian Blue parrot is a good variety to fricasse - a bit like Maris Piper spuds for chips?
Spam goes well with parrot as well.

Given any option, I can think of something better than having a rodent attached to my face. Will have to think a bit about that one.

Your dog seems a tad sensitive given the ability she has to understand what you read to her - I bet you keep your Chinese Takeaway Menus on top of your wardrobe or under your bed.

Well, we have some of the staffing sorted out, uniforms, what about the menu?

Some less scrupulous restauranteurs have their little fiddles:

What the hard girls like who want to dump their currents, is a really expensive meal - something with caviar to start with, followed by finest fillet steak and egg custard pie for pud. Then they just eat the lettuce, the chips, and top their by-now ex- with the custard pie.

That's why the house policy is to get the credit card details up front to confirm the reservation.

Some get good back-handers for letting out the concessions for the individual red roses, and that tone-deaf serenader and violin duo, and there are the customary coin-op vending machines in both toilets, and one just outside the exit from the car park with a sign saying it's the last one for the next 9 months.....

Some "run" the cloakroom to ensure it does well. There are a couple of plastic turds underneath the counter so when a decent coat is collected, they apologise the guard dog has soiled it and they will have it cleaned and sent on. Then they flog the coat and tell the customer to reclaim on his insurance as it got lost being returned to them and they didn't sign the disclaimer and pay the surcharge for goods in transit insurance.

We don't want to be associated with any dodgy stuff like that ! My word, No.

It really is important we go for offering the very best to our guests here at the Nag's.

Perhaps - idea from the OP - a wireless laptop beside every chair, so if guests come out as a party group, they can all chat to each other by message or thread as they are used to, to save having to talk and look at each other?

That might introduce some extra "blind date" trade as well?

There was a good thread here some months ago where peeps suggested the best and worst matching up of pairs of posters here.

All such ideas, plus suggestions for the menu, appreciated please.

:-D

[hockey*mad]

i think u need to hammer a poster on the door and see what the cliental require..i like the idea of the wireless..but think we may need to keep some of them wired,to shock them on occasion to keep them awake,as we havent yet sorted any entertainment..and we could double it up as a torture for those who dont want to part with there hard cash??..
anyway i shall leave you to it..theres a chicken breast in the oven with my name on it,would be a travesty to let it go cold..
i bid you a farewell

[electronic_workshop]

Enjoy your meal - we'll think about the entertainment next time.

Cheers,
:^O
ew

[hockey*mad]

oh just incase=my next door neighbours guinea pig had babies at weekend??..
shall i reserve u one?




lol take care bye

[electronic_workshop]

Thanks for the offer, but I think they had better spend a bit more time with their Mum right now :^O

Would love to see a picture if you can post one up please.

[the.gamekeeper]

😄

[electronic_workshop]

Aha, welcome cultured newbie... friend of Lady Chatterley you be, arrhh? (Shame poor countryside accents don't come over well in typed format!)

[electronic_workshop]

Aha, welcome cultured newbie... friend of Lady Chatterley you be, arrhh? (Shame poor countryside accents don't come over well in typed format!)

[***gyps***]

?????????????

[electronic_workshop]

"gamekeeper" gyps :^O

Hiya, you OK tonight?

[electronic_workshop]

Apologies for double post - ebay server playing up again tonight.

[***gyps***]

EW, is your cat still there?

[***gyps***]

snipe

[electronic_workshop]

Updated on the thread, gyps, Yes. Despite having opportunity three times out front door to head off back "home"...

Cheers,
ew

[toysthen2nowkaren]

Hope you don't mind me eaves dropping but did someone say they knew about PAL? I live in UK so is it ok to buy a game that says PAL version?

[toysthen2nowkaren]

Hope you don't mind me eaves dropping but did someone say they knew about PAL? I live in UK so is it ok to buy a game that says PAL version?