I have no doubt there are users who sell abroad all the time and have no problems at all, but yeah, it's been a disaster for me every time, lol. Situations like this and yes it feels deliberate. They know it's a hassle / expensive to get it returned and so always ask for partial refunds. That is often on top of asking for an initial discount, because of their higher shipping costs. On many occasions, the American buyer would open item not received cases within days, like I was only shipping down the road. They would be refunded by eBay and then the item would arrive later.  I only sell within the UK now, but even these days, I know other sellers complaining about the US buyers leaving items in customs, either refusing to pay the tariff charges at all, or opening 'not-received cases', getting refunded and then collecting the item. Working the system. Basically, you are not alone and yes it is very frustrating.