Getting into the days of Christmas theme, and Partridge, I was unlucky enough to think of 10 Lords a leaping and five gold Rings - leading to "Lord of the Rings" with different themes like "swans", "trees", "pairs", "pears", "leaping" etc. I never want to see a Lord of the Rings listing ever again. Unfortunately this was a long way off from Alan Partridge.

Can someone write some sensible explanation of the previous clues, how to follow them and where they led.

Otherwise just think around the words "HUGE WASTE OF TIME".