Tommy O'Jokah was a solicitor talking to his client, Willow McFecker "Well, Mrs. McFecker, so you want a divorce? Tell me about it. Do you have a grudge?"
"Oh, no," replied Mrs. McFecker. "Shure now, we have a carport."
Tommy tried again. "Well, does the man beat you up?"
"No, no," She replied, looking puzzled. "Oi'm always first out of bed."
Still hopeful, Tommy tried once again.
"What I'm trying to find out are what grounds you have."
"Bless ye, sor. We live in a flat - not even a window box, let alone grounds."
"Mrs. McFecker," Tommy said with considerable exasperation, "you need a reason that the court can consider. What is the reason for you seeking this divorce?"
"Ah, well now," Willow replied, "Shure it's because Finbar can't hold an intelligent conversation."

On your marks, just a little while longer and he'll be here.